Where is the love?

I was recently accosted in a Starbucks parking lot near my home. It was a truly terrifying event and it wasn’t until moments later that I started to realize just how blessed I was for not being physically harmed.

That morning I was following the same routine as always on a day my children go to daycare. I got up around 6:30am, got both kids dressed, fed and ready to go out the door. I assembled the backpacks and the supplies needed for the day. I dropped them off, ordered my coffee on the mobile app and went to pick it up.

The Starbucks parking lot was busier than usual that morning. I parked and got out of the car to retrieve my coffee from inside. Once I got back in my car, I put it in reverse and waited longer than usual because of the volume, craning my neck to see if anyone was coming down the aisle and studying my back-up camera. All was clear so I started to pull out cautiously.

My car was almost completely out of the parking spot, we’re talking around 80-90% removed, when I saw a black car zip down the aisle toward me. I didn’t think anything of it. I was almost done backing out and they certainly weren’t there when I began this journey so I completed my maneuver. I was surprised to hear honking, especially because this car was very late to my back up party.

Eh, whatever, I thought. I put the car in drive and started moving toward the exit. I could see in my rearview mirror the black car pulled into the oncoming traffic lane to go around me so I slowed down assuming he’d pass me and carry on with his day. I was caught off guard when he pulled his car in front of mine at an angle and stopped, cutting off my path forward and preventing me from removing myself from the situation.

I could not believe the amount of rage and anger that was pouring out of this man over something so trivial.

It’s worth noting I’m the type of person who always has the car window open, regardless of season. In the winter I turn on the heat and crack the window, and in the summer I blast the air conditioning and open the window a smidge, which is what I had going on today. I like the air flow and it reduces feelings of claustrophobia that overcome me from time to time.

So I didn’t need to roll down my window to hear the obscenities being screamed at me. Some of the genuinely most heinous things I have ever heard in my life. He kicked off with, “Do you know how a parking lot works you stupid mother f****** dumb a** re****?!” I won’t get into anymore detail as your imagination can most likely fill in the rest. He continued to rant, yelling and turning red. I could see the veins on his forehead and neck popping out.

I was completely slack jawed. I could not believe the amount of rage and anger that was pouring out of this man over something so trivial. Did he know how parking lots work? This kind of stuff happens all the time. All of the large vehicles out there really hinder visibility at times. And not that I’m trying to skirt any sort of responsibility, but I can guarantee he was not anywhere in the vicinity when I started to back up. He was also going dangerously fast for a parking lot to reach me in my state of backing up, if I may point out.

His tantrum carried on for what seemed like 10 minutes but was probably more like 3 or 4. When it appeared he was through, all I could muster was “Do you feel better about yourself now?” That was met with a forceful “F*** YOU!!” And he sped away, barely stopping before barreling out onto the busy four lane boulevard where Starbucks is located.

As I drove home I tried to make sense of what just happened. Why was this individual so full of hatred and rage? This seemed so ridiculous of a situation to get that upset about. I felt bad for him, that his day very well might be ruined, or at the very least starting off on the wrong foot over a perceived atrocity taken against him.

Then I instinctively thought, thank God my children weren’t in the car with me. What would have happened if they were? How would I have explained this to them? Mostly concerned about my son who is quite sensitive to begin with, how would he react to someone yelling at us in that way?

Then reality set in as to just how dangerous of a situation this was. I had just read an article earlier that week about a road rage incident not 5 minutes from where I was at that moment where someone pulled out a gun. No one was hurt and the driver with the gun was arrested, but this had occurred on a road I drive on frequently at that same time of day.

This man in the Starbucks parking lot was clearly unhinged. Whether this was his modus operandi or I had just caught him on a bad day, who knows what he was capable of in that moment. What if he had a weapon in his car? What if he decided this was all too much for him and he was going to take matters into his own hands? What would I have done?

We can change the future of this world by raising loving, tolerant and kind children.

I started to plan my escape. Since he blocked me from going forward, I would have put it in reverse and gone as fast as I could backward down the long aisle, hopefully not hitting any cars. I would have exited through the rear entrance and headed toward the Tops parking lot down the road that would surely have enough people in it to deter him from harming me.

At this point on the drive home the tears were streaming down my face. What if my kids lost their mother today over this? What if they were with me and something happened to them because of my decision to back up at that moment? How could I live with myself?

Once I was in the safety of my own home, I sat down, cried and thought all of the thoughts. In the past, I would have thought this person was a total douchebag, used a few obesities and moved on with my day. Unfortunately, things now are different in our world.

After settling down, two things immediately came to mind: 1) The Black Eyed Peas song “Where is the love?” and 2) George Costanza yelling “You know we’re living in a society! We’re supposed to act in a civilized way!” in The Chinese Restaurant episode of Seinfeld.

While the latter afforded me a little chuckle, the former thought had me reflecting on that very question – where is the love? Every day I read about another mass shooting, murder or deadly altercation. You have to be guarded at all times. Especially with our children.

I will not, CAN NOT, let anything happen to my babies as a result of hate. More importantly, I will raise them to love everyone. Our world has forgotten the golden rule – treat others as you want to be treated. It’s so simple. Love your neighbor and leave the rest to God to judge.

We can change the future of this world by raising loving, tolerant and kind children. I only hope this message can spread as fiercely as the latest political poppycock or celebrity scandal.